Daily Tabliod - Flynn ate my hamster!

Last updated : 13 December 2005 By Fanny Pad

The football world was shocked last night by allegations made against Livingston Chairman and mass sacker Pearse Brosnan-Flynn.

The allegations were made by Mr Marx, a retired Pork Inspector from Mid Calder, who told the fans champion, the Daily Tabloid that Flynn disguised himself as a man from the local electricity company who had come to read the meter and while he wasn’t looking Flynn is alleged to have eaten his pet hamster, after smothering the poor thing in curry sauce.

Pearse last night
Mr Marx, who is openly gay also went on to tell us that several of his neighbours have had the same thing done to them. “Mrs Fanny Slit, from across the road, lost her dog and rabbit in the same way. This time he pretended to be a man from the council checking for dry-rot”.


Both Mr Marx and Mrs Slit believe that Flynn is doing the same thing all over the country, and added “There could be lots of people who think that their dog is missing, when in fact it has been eaten by Brosnan-Flynn (46)!. They should be very careful about who they let into their houses in the future”.


A hamster in Pearse's fridge a wee while ago.
When quizzed about the allegations, Mr Flynn, speaking with a wiggly tail-like thing hanging from his mouth denied all the allegations and declined to comment, saying that his PR team, The Pearse Flynn Supporters Association would make a statement shortly.


We'll post the statement up as soon as we get it!!

Yet again, another EXCLUSIVE brought to you by your number one Livingston FC Fanzine – www.liviultras.com