Following his side’s humiliating 1-0 home defeat to Livingston, 
Furious Duffy was so angry at the performance of his team that he sees this draconian tactic as the wake-up call necessary to keep them in the SPL as Livi continue their slow creep up the table to safety.
Speaking EXCLUSIVELY to the fans’ champion Daily Tabloid, Duffy said “everyone was p*ssing themselves laughing at us on Saturday, and there’s no way I’m taking that! So by stopping my players from p*ssing themselves, they’ll soon learn just how bad things are.”
Near neighbours Dundee United are also keeping close tabs on the situation as their manager/chimp Ian McCall is considering banning his players from defecating, as they seem to be sh*tting themselves too much down Tannadice way just now. “oo oo oo ah ah ah eeeeeeee oo oo!” he told our reporter last night.
Livi manager Vincent Van Gough declined to comment, saying only “what goes on in
