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Thu 28th - TABLOID - Huge African investment for Livi

Last updated : 28 April 2005 By Stu Piddobber

Brosnan gets set to fly to Nigeria, yesterday
Livi owner Pierce Brosnan last night revealed the club is in line for a massive injection of cash from a potential new African investor.


Talking EXCLUSIVELY to the Tabloid, Brosnan said “I got this email yesterday from a fellow in Nigeria called Chief Umbongo Umbongo Theydrinkitinthecongo. Apparently a relative of mine died over there in 2001 with his entire family, leaving $35,000,000 behind, which the greedy Nigerian government is now threatening to confiscate.” Showing us a printed copy of this email, Brosnan continued “so for an arrangement fee of only $15,000 in advance, the entire sum becomes payable to me. Nice one eh?”


We had a good look at the email, and indeed the Chief is, in his own words, “good god feering Christian and grate friend of man David Livingstone. I am also chief accountant to relative and so you trust me 100% OK guy?”


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"The Chief", last night
Expecting such a massive investment to reach the national papers, we contacted Chief Theydrinkitinthecongo at his Lagos office ourselves. “Me good friend, me like you guy, me help you and you help me, OK guy?” he said enthusiastically in a deep, booming voice. We asked him for more details of the investment, however he became a bit more cagey at this, saying “me not know what you say, you say nothing to government or me in big big trouble. Give me bank account number and me pay money in for you guy. You trust me, I am the chief!”


But with a little investigation, we learned of a global racket run from Nigeria, known as the 419 Scam, which sees emails sent to gullible individuals, offering huge sums of money in exchange for “administration costs” paid up-front. Unsurprisingly, the money is quickly taken, but nothing given in exchange, and all email addresses etc purged to make them untraceable.


So armed with this information, we called Pierce straight back to warn him to be careful. “Ah feck” he groaned, “I was gonna buy a new car with that 15 grand. I’ll maybe see if Western Union can stop the payment…”