Wed 22 - Daily Tabloid - Hungry? You will be!

Last updated : 22 December 2004 By Charlie Chump
How much?
A shocked teenager was last night spilling the beans on Livingston FC's latest money spinning venture.

The 13yr old who's name is for us to know and you to find out has sensationally claimed that the current mob of pilfering eleven to fifteen year olds who work the tills at the Pie Stalls have been shown the door by LFC hench woman Viv Lumsden (50).

"It wiznae me wot done it, likes" complained our insider. It wiz Stephanie. She gave Timmy his 'tops' at the recent Dundee game and then he dumped her for Lindsay 'coz she let him go as far as he wanted. Yeah but, no but" she squealed.

More worringly for the wider Livi support than the love life and pocket money tribulations of some spotty kids is that 'Little Chef' will be forcing fans to undertake a mammoth return journey when the urge for their next half time 'all day breakfast' takes them.

In order to fill the page, The Daily Tabloid can exclusively reveal that the only 'Little Chef' available to livi fans will be just off Jcn6 of the M25. Nemo Speaktothehand, spokesperson for the expensive roadside eatery told us quite categorically that "If any Livi fan is that keen on tucking into our rather thin pancakes or syrupy (own brand) cola then that's up to them, but mark my words, we don't deliver"!

So there you have it folks. Here at Tabloid HQ, we bet that you wish you'd never complained about the poor service and poorer selection at the Pie Stalls now, eh?

Don't worry however! We've managed to get our hands on a special money off voucher for every reader. Simply cut out and hand over to the lady who wears the Dick Turpin mask at the tills. *minimum spend £50*

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Blast from the past #24

In todays photo' from the Tabloid archives, Livi fans take the chance to get their hair cut before a match in 1962 outside the West Lothian Courier Bowl (WLCB). The WLCB was home to the Lions from 1895-1965 when a mysterious fire reduced it to rubble. The cause of the fire was never established although to this day rumours still exist that ex owner and fridge magnet Domino (Fats) Quino was seen lighting cigars with players wage slips in the boardroom sortly before the alarms went off.

Can you guess who the young muchkin like figure is? That's right, it's Dov!