Pearse Brosnan (35), Multi Billionaire and owner of Livingston Football Club has issued players at the club with a stern ticking off, after a LIDL customer got a fright as they all raced up the road in their fast cars after training, yesterday.
Apparently, the young Livi stars, including club captain Andrew Murray, earn so much money that the latest game to sweep through the dressing room is to bet on who’s motor is the fastest and has the most coloured stickers on it.
However 85 year old Bernadette Timpson, was less than impressed when her bag of Pineapples and assorted citrus fruits dropped to the ground and burst open, spilling the contents all over the LIDL car park, as the exhausted players hared noisily past the cheap foreign shop after a sweaty half hours worth of intensive mucking around on the Field turf with team manager Richard Van Gough struggling to keep control of them.
“Some of their fast cars were back firing and
everything” she complained, as shop staff helped her locate her wayward produce. “They whipper snappers earn far too much money, by far, it oughtn’t to be allowed” she continued as other elderly hard up shoppers’ tutted in agreement nearby.
When asked to comment on the apparently disregardful road habits of his charges Brosnan refused to shirk responsibility, “Oi’ll kick der erses, so oi will! If dey doo dat wun more time, den oi’ll have dem bak after lunsh for anudder haf our wit Ritchard Goff, an beleev u me, dey’ll not like dat”!