Friday 13th August 2004
Dear Diary….
So today’s Friday the 13th then eh? Unlucky for some but not me, that’s for sure! Just heard some great news you see, all about my bestest buddy in the whole world Alistair Hood. Oh I’m such a happy little toad today!!!
You see Diary, those backstabbers at the “Imperial Overlord of Everyone & Everything Stadium” (my new name for it when I return, tee hee!) thought they’d gotten rid of everyone I hired. Well, except Kinder but his hair’s too silly to count as one of my men. But I read in a paper today that Alistair has been moved upstairs into a new role. Happy day!
Alistair hates people you see. Well, only the fans but they don’t count, do they Diary? In fact, I used to get Alistair to make up all sorts of stupid rules just to piss them all off, and boy was he good at it! He used to ban anything that gave those scumbags any enjoyment. After all it was their fault I got put into administration, wasn’t it? Not mine, I didn’t do anything. Big boys made me do it. Ask my mum, she’ll tell you.
Mind you, I’m not sure what Flynn (the world’s second biggest Sellic fan) has planned for my buddy Al, but I hope it's worthy of his humanitarian skills. Maybe he’ll move the disabled area out into the car park. Or maybe he’ll make Kinder change the lovely new stripes into green ones, then turn them round into hoops the following season. Oh silly Toad, I nearly forgot Alistair’s a hun so he’ll probably just make them all-blue instead. Never mind though cos I’ll just change everything when I’m back anyway.
Don’t tell anyone Diary, but that’s the real reason I’m not giving those b*stards my shares!
I’LL BE BACK! Mwaaah hah hah hah hah hah!
Anyway, better go catch some flies now. I’m hungry. I’ll write you again soon.
Luv D xxx